Angelenos Featured

29 Signs You’re a Basic Bitch in L.A.

November 28, 2017

It’s universally common to make a quick Starbucks pitstop on the way to work each day, or feel out of sorts if you don’t get at least three days of fitness into your weekly routine—but there are certain activities, interests and habits that pertain particularly to Angelenos.

Are you just like everyone else in this town? Or do you stray from the city’s beaten path?

Keep reading for 29 signs you’re a basic bitch in L.A.

Photo Credit: Unsplash / @ocvisual

1. You’re the first to request “Bad & Boujee” at the club

2. ” ‘Don’t Stop Believin’ is your go-to karaoke jam

3. You go to The Bungalow at least once a week

4. You’ve celebrated your birthday at The Bungalow at least once

5. You’ve made out with at least three people at The Bungalow over time

6. You or someone close to you has had their bachelorette at The Abbey

7. The only gay bar you’ve been to is The Abbey

8. You can’t imagine living anywhere but Santa Monica (Venice, if you’re feeling slightly more on the spendy-trendy side)

Photo Credit: Unsplash / @shannacamilleri

9. 75% of your Instagrams involve a gaggle of 4-6 gal pals toasting with either champagne or rosé

10. “Rosé All Day” is your motto—obvi

11. Your social media userpic is either a headshot, you at Runyon, you at Coachella or you in front of a mural wall (bonus points if it’s taken in Venice. Extra bonus points if it’s taken in front of wings!)

Photo Credit: Unsplash / @marianorossi

12. A day in hell for you is one in which you’ve missed Pilates

13. You think Silverlake is too far away and full of way too many hipsters

14. But… all the cool kids are going to Tenants of the Trees, so you’ll make an Eastside exception this once… or twice

15. Alfred Coffee lattes are worth every overpriced penny, in your opinion

Photo Credit: Unsplash / @thecupandtheroad

16. Alfred Coffee is your go-to when you have a day to take your laptop and roam free

17. The baristas at Alfred Coffee (whichever location) know you by name

18. You sign on to buy your Coachella tickets the second they go on sale and will stop at NOTHING to get them

Photo Credit: Unsplash / @ericjamesward

19. Coachella isn’t enough for you. You also go to Stagecoach, ’cause, you know, the more time on those Empire Polo Fields, the better.

20. You don’t usually bother with breakfast, because a Pressed Juicery is right around the corner

21. Halloween is the most important weekend in your L.A. life (besides Coachella, of course!)

22. You’re a ride-or-die Rams and Lakers fan, but you’ve never been to a Dodger game

23. The second Saturday of October is booked from now until eternity (aka when you move out of L.A.)! You’ll obvi be at the Veuve Clicquot Polo Classic (because polo is your fav sport and all)

Photo Credit: Pixabay

24. Your weekend morning routine goes as follows: work out, grab juice, head to flea market

25. You drive a Mercedes, BMW or Prius

26. You love going to brunch (usually in Venice), mainly so you can pack your Insta feed with photos like this:

Photo Credit: Unsplash / @brookelark

27. You consider yourself an “influencer” and can actually explain to someone in-depth what the term means

28. You refuse to tag any brand or product on social media unless you’re being paid to do so

29. When you’re not downing bottles of rosé, vodka soda is the only alcoholic beverage you’d dare consume


  • If only 1-9 signs pertain to you, you’ve managed to live in a metropolitan area without succumbing to everyone else’s norm. It’s hard not to be influenced by everyone else around you, but you’ve proved it’s possible. You live your most authentic life and have figured out what works for you. You’re pretty independent and don’t care about being “seen.”
  • If 10-19 signs pertain to you, you like doing your own thing, but you also love being in big crowds and running into people you know. You love to have fun, and even if it means following the norm, it’s cool with you as long as it keeps you busy.
  • If 20-29 signs pertain to you, you have a bad case of FOMO. You don’t like being apart from your group, and if you’re stuck being somewhere or doing something different from them even for a night, you’ll go crazy. It’s hard for you to adapt to new surroundings and get out of your comfort zone, but at least you have a routine that keeps you motivated and content, and people know what to expect from you.

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